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Race might include a Hercules Pull, hoisting a ponderous concrete weight on a pulley higher and higher into the air; or scaling four 16-foot A-frame walls. Imagine pushing tractor tires up a mountainside. A hallmark of a Spartan Race is a mud event, pools or ditches that must be waded, leapt over or crawled through beneath hundreds of yards of barbed wire. If the latter sounds menacing, try this: a dash through 10,000 volts of dangling electric wire. I think I will refuse Joe De Sena's vow of "ripping people off their couches and helping them lead happier, healthier and more productive lives." However, a vicarious torment HYLAND

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